Warlight by Michael Ondaatje

You can’t go into this novel expecting it to read chronologically. It is a dream, a vignette where the edges have been chipped away, washed away by what is lost to Nathaniel. The brilliance of the novel is its complexity and the connections of maps and people, the same way the author constructs a map for the reader of places and strangers. Also the story itself is just as cloudy and muddled as the protagonist’s mother who is a mystery he is trying to discover throughout the story.

I don’t read Ondaatje’s work because I want to be entertained as much as I want to experience life through the eyes of someone new, and because his prose is delicious. It is like reading Dinesen’s Out of Africa—it all came out of the memory of her experience, as the book drew me in for the words alone and the experience of a life I’ll never know. However, even though I enjoyed the book I didn’t like it as much as The English Patient.

This is me…

Thought I’d introduce myself today. It’s funny but if you follow my posts on @booksandloststories you know more about me than some of my closest family members. Talking about my faith openly and the books I love and “doctors” of the church I admire has been such a pleasure for me this past year with all of you. And I thank you for your follows and consistent ‘likes’. If anything, sharing these things gives me great pleasure and I hope some of you have found my content helpful or refreshing.

It seemed safer somehow to talk about this stuff with invisible strangers than people that knew me way back when.

I have always loved the verses from John, Luke, and Matthew that all say, “For Jesus himself testified, that a prophet has no honor in his own country.” (John 4:44).

I’m sure many of you can relate to that. Not that I think I’m a prophet but a changed person, a person of consistent, contemplative growth, yes. We all must change and grow but some want to keep us in boxes built out of images from our past spiritual immaturity or just general immaturity.

To quote Lauryn Hill from her MTV Live album, “whatever isn’t growing is dead.” Keep growing, no matter what people say.

Other than that I love to cook and make parties for my family, I love hats and it’s rare to see me without one, I can’t resist a bookshop, I often contemplate seminary school or a doctorate to teach university, I write nonsense everyday and sometimes important stuff —like an open letter to the Catholic Church denouncing their dismissal of LGBTQ organizations in Detroit (inclusion should be the goal of all churches).

I want to make the world a better, safer place. Sometimes I get overwhelmed, so I hide in my house and write letters like this and formulate plans and then the kids start fighting, and I’m called back to motherhood. This is my life. Thank you for sticking around to observe it from afar.

Thomas Merton: The Seven Storey Mountain

Finished it over the weekend. It was so good! I could have done without part one, but I guess it was useful to see how far he came from not giving any thought to the existence of God to becoming a Trappist monk. Wish I were still reading it. Merton is an excellent teacher, I feel like I finished a long journey with a dear friend. If any of you out there are in a discernment period to possibly go to seminary school, which is something I wrestle with often, you should definitely read this!💕

A Balzac Translation

Funny thing… both these books are the same but they have completely different translations for their endings. Makes me wish I would have read the top one instead. What do you think?

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The boy, the mole, the fox and the horse by Charlie Mackesy

My daughter (age 10) and I have been doing a lot of reading together lately. The other night she read me this wonderful book by @charliemackesy . As the author explains, it is a book you can start in the middle, the end, or the beginning. My daughter wrote a wonderful write up about it to her teacher to keep up with her schoolwork during the quarantine. Beautiful and poetic, the book is filled with Mackesy’s wonderful drawings and wise words for children and adults alike. My daughter and I really enjoyed it! .

Contemplative Vision by Juliet Benner

Contemplative Vision by Juliet Benner is a book about contemplating religious art with prayer in mind and using it to expand our prayer life by gazing at the face of God through it, seeing His face and meditating about the art’s purpose/story, and the artist’s time creating it. The book discusses using art as a purpose to expand our faith and awe. For instance, the artists who create icons of Christ meditate on his face for hours while painting him. Just beautiful! .

First Corinthians…

These are only my own contemplative thoughts. You may disagree and that’s OK!!

“When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I

reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of

childhood behind me.”

—1 Corinthians 13:11

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To doubt His mercy is like being a child when they sob and carry on

because they do not get what they want, and you, their guardian, are

appalled at the greed and neglect they display when they say they hate you, or when they storm off and say “you don’t love me!”. When my kids do this I just want to hit my head against the wall! Do they not

remember all the previous love and tender care I gave them in the

past? But they are children. They cannot see the bigger picture or the

life lessons I’m trying to teach them. Nor can they fathom all that

previous love I gave them, they are greedy for the ‘right now’. If you’re not giving them what they want ‘now’ you must hate them, you

must not want them, you must have forgotten them. Sometimes we can be the same way to God—if our prayers are not answered swiftly we feel He is not there, He has forgotten us, He doesn’t want us. But He is merely looking out for our best interest—maybe that job you wanted wasn’t for you? Maybe you would have gotten into an accident had you left for work on time today? We have to trust His guidance and keep our faith. We must not be like spoiled children, but humbled always and patient to put those childish ways behind us. I must remember this next time my kids are throwing a fit. I’m sure God rolls his eyes and shakes his head up there a lot, but always with a loving, tender

smile—for His love for us is great.

Seasons of Grace by Leslie Tentler

Possibly the driest book I’ve ever tried to read, but I feel like this might just change my thinking somehow or maybe even my life. Why do I think this? I don’t know. It was a recommendation from one of the archivists at the Archdiocese. I trust this guy’s opinion, though I think he may be on a different level. When I first met him he was translating an 18th century journal from Latin to English. 😬

I’m going to give it a try and see what I learn—probably more than I’d ever want to know! I was so desperate for it I ordered it from the lending library program! 🤷‍♀️ Hey, maybe when I finish I’ll pick up some lessons in Latin!